


Damara ♦ Dirk - We Learnt Japanese Because Anime

by ooopo123



Series: Randomly Generated Ships: Rare-pairs Galore [14]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Anime Saves the Day, Badly translated Japanese, Damara is a Little Shit, Gen, Japanese, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, dirk is a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:48:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23821837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ooopo123/pseuds/ooopo123
Summary: With the glaring of the sun questions arose. Such as how he'd came to be on the roof in the first place, splayed across the concrete like a sausage on the grill. Or why there was a Troll, a member of the same species as the Fish Bitch hershellf, on Earth in the first place; let alone on the roof of his home.
Relationships: Damara Megido & Dirk Strider
Series: Randomly Generated Ships: Rare-pairs Galore [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1542388
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	Damara ♦ Dirk - We Learnt Japanese Because Anime

**Author's Note:**

> 14th in a 30 part series!

In truth, Dirk had never met another human being in all the years he’d been alive. Squinting at the figure standing over him, at the strange shapes protruding from their head, he realised he still hadn’t.

With the glaring of the sun, amplified by the fact Dirk had managed to misplace his shades somewhere between his room and the roof, questions arose. Such as how he'd came to be on the roof in the first place, splayed across the concrete like a sausage on the grill. Or why there was a Troll, a member of the same species as the Fish Bitch hershellf, on Earth in the first place; let alone on the roof of his home.

The deafening sound of seagulls squawking all around them didn’t provide any answers. Nor was it helping him think of any either.  
“You dead?” With the pitch of those words, Dirk guesses that the Troll is female. Then again, maybe they aren’t. Who knows how alien biology or gender works; because it's certainly not he.

“Not yet. It’d be nice of you to let me know if you’re here to fix that, though.” The Troll girl scoffs. Wearily, Dirk hefts himself up onto his elbows. She backs up a couple steps and a good chunk of the gulls take flight. The roof in their absence is a lot quieter.

It’s still just as hard to think.

“Unfortunate for you, I is not so kind.” With a huff, the Troll girl takes a seat on the ground, leaning up against the long dead air conditioning unit. Dirk is silently grateful for the space between them.

“So, are you going to start the whole _take me to your leader_ shtick? Because, and I hate to break it to you, I’m the best you're gonna get in that department.” A smirk tugs at her black painted lips. Dirk unconsciously slips half a dozen shuriken out of his Sylladex and into the palm of his hand.

“Do all pink aliens fucking talk too much?” Dirk risked a glance down at himself and, sure enough, his once pale skin was now as pink as shrimp. That was going to hurt so _much_ later on. The Troll girl was mid eye-roll when he looked back up at her. “ _Tch._ クソばか.”

Dirk paused as his brain automatically translated the sentence.

クソばか.

Kuso baka..

Fucking idot…

_Hey, wait a second-!_

“No! Fuck _you!_ I’ll have you know that I am _not_ an idiot! In fact I’m a fucking _genius!_ ” The Troll’s smirk twists into a sneer.

“You do not look it to me! You are idiot who sleeps outside! IQは身長と同じくらい低い!” Dirk moves so his right foot is pressed against the concrete underneath him. Ready to pounce at a moment’s notice.

“Oh, what?! Are we taking jabs at each other’s looks now? Well, glad to know that your personality is as shallow as your skirt is short!” There’s not many things that can move faster than Dirk, not even the various robots he’s made. Yet the girl is quicker than she looks. She’s on him before he can react; hauling him up by the neckline of his tank top and holding a pointy needle-like object to his Adam's apple. His shuriken hit the concrete with a series of metallic clangs. The last of the seagulls, frightened, take flight. Semi-hysterically he wonders how she got the jump on him, wondering if the heat is getting to him.

“Take that back you waste of air, ugly looking-!” Suddenly, the Troll Girl pulls up short. Her eyes widening to comical proportions “Wait.”

Dirk blinks.

“Huh?”

“You… Understand East Beforan?”

“Uuuh…” Testing the girl’s grip, Dirk finds that she lets go of him easily. He basks in both confusion and the relieving sensation of no longer being at the sharp end of a weapon. “You mean Japanese?”

“That what you call it?” She shakes her head before staring Dirk down appraisingly. “No matter. How? You are not Troll.”

“And you’re probably not Japanese. Yet here we are.” He gestures around with his arms, her gaze tracking them wearily. He drops them with a sigh.

“Look, since we’re not trying to kill each other anymore… Hopefully” Dirk throws a thumb over his shoulder, pointing at the door to the stairwell. “Wanna watch some anime?”

The Troll girl hesitates, turning her head to look at the middle distance, before nodding in a single jerky motion. Dirk grins.

Who would have thought being a weeb would one day actually help him out.

… That, and he still doesn’t know how the girl got on his roof.

**Author's Note:**

> Translations: (According to Google Translate)  
> クソばか = Fucking idiot  
> IQは身長と同じくらい低い = Your IQ is as low as your height
> 
> (This was meant to be super angsty, but ofc I can't take anything seriously so instead y'all get this. XD)


End file.
